Tuesday, September 02, 2008

Unicornucopia


This was the best thing that Bryn got me at Powell's this weekend. It is a folder with a unicorn spinny-wheel, enabling the spinner to confront a variety of situations with such advice as:

  • Majestically gallop
  • Nuzzle a newborn
  • Race the wind
  • Frolic in a meadow
  • Pose on a windy cliff
  • Impale evil things

It gets even better though. On the inside is printed "The Unicorn Code." For those of you who might be unfamiliar with this Code, it goes as follows:

  1. Unicorns never cheat on tests.
  2. Unicorns always lend a helping hand. (Shouldn't it be "helping hoof?")
  3. Unicorns are never tardy.
  4. Unicorns pick flowers for their teacher.
  5. Unicorns respect school property.
  6. Unicorns aren't conceited.
  7. Unicorns don't judge people.
  8. Unicorns turn in their homework on time.
  9. Unicorns only use their horns if they have to.
  10. Unicorns don't do drugs.

Yes, you too can be a unicorn if you follow these ten simple rules. This folder is almost better than an amazing snack! Almost...

2 comments:

Snotty McSnotterson said...

Um, what do you MEAN they don't judge people? There's no way I could be a unicorn.

RiverMist said...

unicorns are cool!
but i like elves better.